Where To Draw The Line
When I first had the idea of creating a site such as this, based on weblog technology, I asked myself, “what am I going to say?”
This is not from lack of things to say, but rather, to what degree do I wish to share my life and my experiences? There are many who use a weblog much like a journal, only instead of it being private, it is there for other people to see. Is this pure exhibitionism? A cry for attention? Or is it simply offering what is in one’s mind, so that others may better understand, or agree, or disagree? I think, rather than setting down the law here by saying, “this is right, that is wrong,” it is better for me to think in terms of what I would wish to say.
For my part, I have written in a journal for years, on and off. These were my private thoughts, safe from the world’s view. Just as the seed needs the darkness and protection of the deep earth in which to first sprout, so too do we sometimes need privacy for the things that are not yet strong enough in us to share with the world and perhaps face ridicule or prejudice, the extinguishing of fires of dreams barely lit.
As time has gone on, I have learned the value of caring less about what others say or think, and trusting my own instincts and feelings, being careful to see whether those thoughts I am having are really mine, or are just recordings repeated, initially spoken by other people. To live without fear and to be truly comfortable with myself, that is a big part of where I aim my growth and development. What better test, then, than to share more of myself in the public forum, to say, “this is what I do, what I think, what I feel.. this is what I believe to be true” (though I can only do my best, these things are subject to change as time goes on, as all things are).
And so, this site was born. However, just as I have looked through my old journals and seen that much of them recorded mundane experience, the same thing over and over, with no true value to it, I recognize that I do not want to fill this site with every minute detail of my day and my life. Here, I share what I think and believe, what interests me, and with it what might interest others. At its core, I hope that this site adds to people’s lives, that they may learn from what I say, or that it may provoke thought and questions. How many it reaches, that is not up to me. If one person can say “yes, my life is better for having read that,” then it has been of value. And, of course, that one person is already here. That person is me.
So, fear not! I will be speaking words of wisdom and interest, sharing parts of my life that ultimately contribute to a more peaceful life, and a more satisfying one. I will not be telling you what I had for breakfast, or how long it takes to walk from my room to the toilet (well, unless I can think of a good reason to…).